I went to my new gynecologist this week. He’s a dude. I tried to find a woman in my area with good reviews that accepted my insurance, but there were none. He was super nice though. I told him I switched gynecologists because mine didn’t deliver babies up by where I live. You know you’ve reached your scary age when people stop telling you you’re too young to be thinking about having kids. I appreciate the non judgement, but I am too young, don’t you think? Anyone?
I might be old enough, but I’d still rather wait at least another year. I mean, once you have one, you can’t take it back. I really like my life right now. I didn’t have much fun in high school or college. I spent a lot of my time working on my site. Now that that’s my job, I’m discovering new hobbies and I spend my free time doing traditional fun stuff like, you know, socializing.
Babies are a lot of work. I feel like a dog would be too much work, never mind a baby. I can’t keep the house clean now. And they’re expensive. I’m not saving a whole lot of money right now. Granted it’s been a super expensive year, but with a baby, it will always been a super expensive year.
And despite the positive things Rachelle has to say about daycare, I really hate the idea of leaving my kid for 40+ hours a week with someone, well, who isn’t me. I realize that this will always be an issue as long as I’m working and we need me to be working, but it really bothers me. I can work from home several days a week, but only if I’m not the primary caregiver for a child while I’m working, which makes sense. That’s still probably the best option, though I hate working from home.
Then of course there’s the whole pregnancy and childbirth thing. No seasonale, no painkillers NO ZYRTEC. And oh the decisions to make. It’s not just drugs vs no drugs, breast feeding or formula it’s do you want to give birth in the hospital, birthing center, home? Which hospital, which doctor, c-section or natural? Lying down, squatting, in water? I’d like to be drugged up, but I also think I’d rather have gravity on my side…
The only thing I know for sure is that my kid is getting vaccinated. Vaccinations only protect us as a society if the great majority of people do it. I think it’s incredibly selfish and dangerous to not vaccinate. /end rant
Um, yeah, I was just going to write a paragraph about how my new doctor is cool, but I guess I got off topic a little. Hey, who watched Ringer last week? That looks pretty decent, right? Work picnic at the beach Friday, that was… not worth $18. How many days until Italy?
Oh wow, I never see this side of Lissy very often… :( Sorry about everything you’re going through. I can’t help with much since I’ve never been through any of that before. :( *hugs*, I wish you the best of luck, everything will work out, so don’t stress too much about it.
You’re right, babies are a lot of work and a lot of responsibility. The choice to have kids isn’t one that should be taken lightly. I’ve never really thought about kids, it’s not in the picture for me right now. I’m still too young, and I’m almost 23. I’m just not in the right state of mind yet.
I hope when you decide to have kids that you’re ready and prepared =)
LOL — yeah i haven’t read this side of Lissy before …
Having a kid or thinking about having a kid is pretty darn stressful. It is mind consuming. That is all that has been on my mind for years. years of trying then conceiving then worrying about the risk of pregnancy and all that joy, but that’s just b/c of the cards I was dealt. Some people have it VERY easy.
I agree the financial stress too — it’s very difficult with me not working, and I am not pro daycare, not at the prices in New Jersey. Forgetaboutit.
Dogs are a lot of work, but good practice for kids. If you have family that is local, you wind up taking in everything they want to offer in terms of help or goodies etc… Don’t turn anyone away.
Anyway … I agree with you on vaccinations too :-)
Glad you like your new doc!
Yes you are STILL YOUNG!!!! It’s good to think about kids right now…key word “think” & possibly begin to plan as to when would be the opportune time to start trying & when this future Lissy/Bryan child will be born.
It is a lot of work…and you enjoy your freedom now…if it’s something you can’t part with then don’t..although know that since you want kids you will make that sacrifice eventually, but only when you are both ready.
As for daycare…I know Rachi has good things to say…but you never know who is going to be taking care of your kid. Granted a lot of professionals are out there, but a lot may not be. Not to mention the string of sicknesses your kids can catch from other kids is just insane….and gross. Sure it may strengthen their immune system…but think of how many times you may have to stay home to take care of a sick kid. Is it worth it? May not be…not to mention if you take them places they’re exposed to stuff regardless.
Anyways..just my input. If you ever need to talk about it lemme know :)
I am in the same boat as you and I’m a year older than you are. It is your decision and if you’re not ready then it’s nobody’s business to tell you that you should have a kid. Just because you’re married and you’re in your 20’s doesn’t mean OMG MAKE A BABY. I really wish people would stop telling me that.
The finances scare the crap out of me, too.
BABIES! OMG! I think that if people are ready both financially and emotionally, then go for it. But if you still feel to young and not ready, then don’t. People put pressures on others all the time, and the only way to make a rational decision is to make it yourself, you know? Good luck, whatever you decide, I’m sure it will be awesome. :)
Having kids is the last thing on my mind right now. I’m trying to focus on my life, because children can be time consuming. At first, when I started reading, I thought you were expecting. :P
You’re still very young!
I did a Obstetrics and Gynae rotation last year, oh gosh it put me off having kids. Haha. The decisions, the emotions, the pain! I found there were a lot more male obstetricians and gynaecologists where I was placed. It’s the hectic and unpredictable lifestyle of being on call that makes it hard for women.
Go you for wanting to vaccinate your kids. I’ve met people who don’t want to and it really drives me nuts but all I can do is be understanding. There is no evidence to suggest vaccinations do more harm than good and the studies which stated so have been shown to be false and fake! You are totally right, vaccinations work on herd immunity, so everyone needs input. Gosh– now you’ve started me on a rant. :p
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with you wanting to wait to have babies. I have two and they’re a handful. It may not be as BAD as I’d expected it to be when I was younger but it can be overwhelming. I say keep your hobbies and live your life the way you want to at the moment. You need time to plan for a baby! I don’t like the idea of daycare, either, but since my sister is home majority of the day she babysits for me because I’d be paranoid about my children otherwise.
However, through it all, everyone has baby anxiety at some point (at least I like to believe so), but once you actually have one, you’ll find that taking care of one becomes a natural thing, like breathing/blinking. At least that’s how it is for me. The financial side of things is another story…
I remember someone I know telling me that “Dr ___ is the only person who’s going to see what I have down there”. I think a gynecologist has got to be someone you trust. I wouldn’t be cool with a male. I felt awkward enough having a male when I had to get my breasts checked. -_-
Don’t go for a kid. I think you’re still pretty young. I’d definitely wait a year at least… heck, I’d probably wait until you’re 29, 30. Only do it if you’re ready. And if you’re not ready financially either, the answer is no. I am way too young to be thinking about kids of course, but thinking about money is something I do a bit too frequently…
My mum took 16 years off work to take care of my brother and I. I mean she just stopped working. She never wanted to send us to daycare and have someone else take care of us.
well neither of us are going to be making any more money in a few years than we are now probably. we’d be ok, but we wouldn’t be able to save any money for probably three years, so I’d like to put a lot away before hand.
Oh my gosh, it’s like you took the words right out of my mouth about having babies! Everyone is bugging us, but we just aren’t ready. For all the reasons you just wrote down: money, time, work, etc, etc. One day it will be the right time and that is when it should happen!!
I watched Ringer and I really like it so far. It’s so cool that SMG plays two characters :D
Stick to your guns and keep rocking it out Lissy. You have time before you need to make these difficult decisions. And when you’re ready, you and Bry will be incredible, loving parents who will raise fantastic little people.
Also, hell yeah, keep gravity on your side! If I ever have a baby that is one thing I am sure I’ll do. That and vaccinations (which are a bit of a headache for scheduling, I hear through the BabyLo grapevine).