Author Archives: Lissy

Covid Toe

Covid Toe

I have covid toe. No, not really, but the dr I went to thinks I might. I explained I haven’t been exposed as no one around me, including four other adults have gotten sick. He still wanted me to get tested, even though my toes had been like this for six weeks. And he prescribed me medicine and then told me not to use it when I asked if it was OK if I’m breastfeeding. Yes, I’m breastfeeding, it was in that 12 page questionnaire you had me fill out. I didn’t go back for my followup. I have chilbains. It’s cold, I don’t get out, I wear shoes a lot less.

So… that’s my exciting news. It’s snowed a lot. Another reason my toes are cold. I think Owen’s tired of sledding. He also says his new sled works too well and is scary. He liked the 89 cent one over the $53 one.

Glenn’s been sleeping a lot better. He’s down to nursing once or twice a night now. Night weaning him has been much easier. We talk about it before going to sleep and then he actually tries not to have milk. I told him it’ll taste better if the milk sleeps all night. I mean, it’s kinda true, right? He’s still “too skinny,” but his dr said he doesn’t need milk at night.

He starts off the night saying “night night Owen, night night Mama, night night Dada, night night baby yoda, night night ducks, night night poop … he he, night night poop” 💩 He sleeps with four ducks and I have to sing the duck songs before he goes to sleep.

Owen was all for sharing a room with Glenn for a while and then he changed his mind about it because “he’s too little to protect me from monsters.” So I missed my window.

Work has been interesting. We’re working with graph neural networks which are pretty cool, but like all things, it’s been hard to get data. After spending all that time on my azure certifications, I’ve done nothing with azure so far.

I’m taking a break from training for now. I’ve been spending my free time planning our Disney vacation at the end of the year, picking out a printer and doing our taxes. Crazy stuff.

Every year before the new year begins, I look back at past recorded years. Earlier entries have been edited for length. Current year’s at the bottom if you want to skip to that.

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New Year Survey 2020

New Year Survey 2020

1. What did you do in 2020 that you’d never done before? Stayed home for months.
2. Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? Um, apparently I didn’t make any last year. But I got two azure certifications this year, so yay me anyway. Next year I want to carve out more time for myself.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth? Nitika
4. Did anyone close to you die? My uncle
5. What countries did you visit? … NA
6. What would you like to have in 2021 that you lacked in 2020? Must get out! Must go do things!
7. What date from 2020 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? March in general. How we thought we were going to be home for two weeks and it lasted all year and then some.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? Finishing that soap service? Probably the azure developer certification.
9. What was your biggest failure? Screaming at the kids
10. Did you suffer illness or injury? One good thing about never leaving the house, we haven’t gotten sick in a really long time. I did sprain my wrist though.
11. What was the best thing you bought? I bought a lot of stuff this year. My new vacuum, Glenn’s new vacuum. New phone, galaxy watch. The boys really like their christmas presents. I’d say the wooden blocks were the best investment though. They play with them every day.
14. Where did most of your money go? Groceries, baby stuff
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? The vaccine! Trump losing the election!
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
l. happier or sadder? I don’t think anyone is happier
ll. thinner or fatter? I actually lost weight
lll. richer or poorer? Richer
18. What do you wish you’d done more of? Sleeping
19. What do you wish you’d done less of? Yelling
20. How will you be spending Christmas? Our parents came over our house
24. What was your favorite TV program? I watched all of Supernatural. The ending was pretty satisfying. The Queen’s Gambit was very good.
26. What was the best book you read? I guess one of the Magic Tree House books… I’d be hard to pick one though.
28. What did you want and get? Passed my microsoft exams
29. What did you want and not get? sleep, to go … anywhere
30. What was your favorite film of this year? I actually really liked Superintelligence. Still need to see the last Star Wars movie and Bill and Ted
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I turned 35 and ordered food for just myself from a fancy restaurant
32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Not being stuck at home all day every day
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2020? PJs and yoga pants
34. What kept you sane? My MIL and Owen’s teachers
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Fauci
36. What political issue stirred you the most? omg. Racism and Covid shouldn’t even be political issues, but somehow they were. And then of course there was the election.
37. Who did you miss? Literally everyone
38. Who was the best new person you met? Owen’s teachers
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2020: Secondary emotions are a thing and I shouldn’t feel guilty for feeling what I’m feeling.
41. Summarize 2020:

Mask Trash GIF by 100% Soft - Find & Share on GIPHY


42. What are you most looking forward to next year? Getting this vaccine so I can go places and see people again
43. What were your predictions last year? Planning our Disney trip was not stressful, because I never got to. Glenn starting walking a little early and oh look at that, I am indeed still breastfeeding and this kid will never let me stop.
44. What are your predictions for 2021? Dude, if we don’t get to go to Disney next year, I’m, I’m going anyway. Even if they’re closed. I’ll be put on boring migration work. Maybe, just maybe, I’ll go back to my office? See my friends again? See family?

Last Bit of Summer

Last Bit of Summer

I had a dream last night that not only were we dealing with the pandemic, but nazis too. Then I woke up and couldn’t get back to sleep because I realized it wasn’t all that far off from reality. A few years ago, I thought the one thing everyone could agree on was that nazis were bad.

I don’t understand how racism and mask wearing became partisan issues. To me, we’re taking the very basics of being a decent human being here. I just don’t get it.

This hasn’t been the best summer, obviously.  I’m glad we’re safe and healthy, I still have a job,  but, 2020.

Our dryer broke a few months ago and we’re still waiting for the new one to ship. I think I wrote about the bathtub breaking and calling the emergency plumber? My car needed a new alternator and our AC flooded our basement. We’re looking to replace our water heater before that decides to explore.

Salt water from the ocean seems to have killed my fitbit as well. And my phone only charges via wireless now. My phone i can live with, but I really need a new smart watch and can’t decide if I want anther fitbit or the galaxy watch. I think either will be huge on my tiny wrists.

OK, enough negativity. Owen started virtual school last week and the first day was rough, but now he really likes it. He gets super upset when he’s not called in to share (they call on him a lot) but otherwise, he’s doing great. He still wishes it was in person, he can’t really make friends this way, but he’s making the most of it. Very proud of him. He also lost his first tooth!

He filled out a thing for gymnastics about himself and said he wants to be a police officer when he grows up. A very controversial career at the moment. He just wants to catch bad guys and make the world a better place. I hope with everything that’s started this year, we’ll create a better future where he can do just that, if he still wants to. We do tell him about what’s happening in the world. We talk about racism and how some cops aren’t good guys. I don’t know how much sticks, but we’ll keep taking too him because raising good people is our most important job.

The Stinky Cheese Man

The Stinky Cheese Man

Glenn got his MMR vaccine a couple weeks ago and was soon a pile of misery for days. He had so much trouble sleeping and eating. It’s been rough. He seems to be pretty normal now.

And then our bathtub broke and we had to call an emergency plumber.

And then this storm hit and we lost power for seven hours. We’re lucky though, a lot of people still don’t have power.

But I took Owen to the beach and he loved it. Almost as much as video games he says. So we’ll be going back next week. It’s nice to go somewhere for a change.

I bought myself this rocketbook panda planner and it’s great. I didn’t realize how badly I needed it until I got it. So much swimming around in my brain, now all down in there. Plus the gratitude stuff is a really nice way to start the day. I ask Owen what he’s grateful for too.

Glenn is talking a lot. I swear he says one or two new words a day. This morning he said “butt cream.” Can’t make this stuff up.

2020 is the Worst

2020 is the Worst

This week has just been awful. I keep hearing about more and more people who lost their jobs Friday. So many amazing people. They only have two weeks and we can’t even say goodbye properly. My heart breaks for them. I wish there was something I could do. I hate this so much.

I bought myself a planner because I feel like I’m all over the place. It certainly helps to keep me organized, but I have so much on my plate, I don’t think any amount of organizing can keep my stress levels down.

I made myself physically sick. I had mastitis last week. Or maybe it was trying to wean, or both. So weaning is on the back burner for now. I really gotta get to the office to pick up my pump, but probably a lot of people going there the next couple of weeks to clean out their desks. So many good people. :(

Fortunately my kids are adorable and always cheer me up, when they’re not being insane anyway. Glenn is a climber too. He’s exhausting.

It’s Summer

It’s Summer

It occurred to me that this website is still on my resume. Made sense when I had my portfolio here, not so much now. I should just have one big link to the Evil Squirrels video. Helped get me an offer once before.

I just came back from a morning walk with Glenn. He’s so cute, he points at everything. Bunny, squirrel, dog, bird. This morning he pointed at someone’s front steps and said, “up!”

Still, I would much rather sleep in the morning than go on these sunrise walks. The night weaning has not been going well. His attitude has been, you won’t nurse me, fine, I won’t sleep. And I can’t even give in because it hurts! I hope he gets the new routine soon. I’m so tired of being tired.

Owen graduated preschool this week :'( he saw four of his classmates at his teacher’s house on Friday, but i think it just made him sad, not being able to play with them. He’s so done with all this. I feel so bad for him. I hope school is somewhat normal in the fall. He needs to play with other kids.

Work has been pretty doom and gloomy. Everyone is deeply concerned about their jobs. Not being able to see anyone I think makes it worse too, being disconnected like that. Maryam and I received high praise for the mentoring we’re doing which made me feel mildly better. I miss my coworkers.

Still Duck inside

Still Duck inside

We’ve been bouncing quarantine away on our bounce house. Glenn learned to say yeah! Just so he can answer, do you want to go in the bounce house?

Everything else is Donald Duck. Look geese, “Donald Duck!”

His sleep has been shit. My mental health coach has been pushing me to night wean or sleep train since it seems to have the biggest effect on my mood. I read my post on night weaning Owen and took my own advice and put him to sleep without nursing at the beginning of the night. He cried for 30 minutes, but had the best night ever after that. So much so I woke up at 4:30 and couldn’t fall back asleep, so I’m watching supernatural.

The mental health coaching is free from att. I’m mostly learning to be mindful and to take time for self care. Helping me not be so cranky all the time.

We saw my parents for the first time in months last weekend. No one seems to know anymore what we’re supposed to be doing. Yes, we could stay locked in our houses forever, but I see how badly the kids need to interact with other kids. No idea what kindergarten will be like in the fall. No idea if I’ll ever go back to the office. Disney’s opening again next month, but who knows how that’ll go.

The End of the World

The End of the World

So this Corona virus has everyone losing their minds. The hysteria is way scarier than the virus itself so far. We are to work from home until further notice and schools are closing. Owen had school today, but only he and Mika were there.

I’m worried more for the folks who can’t work from home, whose jobs rely on customers, Healthcare workers. Such a mess.

Glennikins will be 11 months in a few days, so upside, I guess I’m done with pumping. He still doesn’t sleep, but maybe he’ll do better with me home.