Nightweaning the Stubborn, Bedsharing Toddler

Nightweaning the Stubborn, Bedsharing Toddler

So it’s been over a year since I started night weaning and we’ve gone from nursing 8-15 times a night to once in the “morning” at 5:30am :) I thought I would share the resources and tips that helped me. I read a lot of parenting books and articles and basically take what works for us.

The No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley: I think her methods are a little too gentle for a kid like Owen, but her advice laid the foundation for some good sleep habits- like having a bedtime routine and not letting him fall asleep nursing at the beginning of the night which I think sets the tone for the rest of the night. I was never able to get him attached enough to a lovely to replace me and the sleep cues never caught on. In fact, I am no longer allowed to sing the “sleepy Owen song” as it just makes him angry.

Jay Gordon’s Gentle night weaning method: this was the basis for our night weaning method with a few tweaks. When I first tried, I had to go a lot slower and there was a ton of screaming directly in my ears. I was wearing earplugs to bed for a while because I feared for my hearing. Eventually, I gave up on dropping the 1am feed and decided nursing one time at night wasn’t so bad. This made things much more peaceful. When he was sick and when we were on vacation, I’d nurse him as much as he wanted, and then used Gordon’s method again to reintroduce night weaning to get back on track. Teaching him to fall asleep without nursing was definitely worth all the screaming in the beginning. Even though it took him a long time to go all night without nursing, he went for much longer stretches. We went from nursing 10 times a night to four times most nights.

The warning: He came up with this one himself. We count to three before we do anything upsetting or exciting so he can prepare himself. I let him know before I’m going to unlatch him and count to three and this has helped a lot. Instead of crying, he’ll smile and he’ll often count to three on his own. This was also useful in Disney when we were getting off rides.

Fill him up before bed: this advice came from one of my coworkers, but it was hard to implement. I can’t force him to eat, but once he realized he wasn’t getting anymore milk at night, he started eating giant meals at dinner. Smart kid. Screw the “you eat your veggies or no more carbs” rule. If cheeriowens are all he’ll eat at dinner, I’ll just keep piling them on and sneak spinach into his smoothie in the morning. We’ve also been day weaning as well the past few months. He’ll nurse in the morning and before bed, sometimes after his nap, but that’s all. This helped a lot in getting him to eat enough food.

No sneaking out: several books mentioned this as a no no. I do think it gave Owen some anxiety as when he woke up, he immediately would go looking for me. This stopped when I started leaving him to fall asleep on his own some nights after nursing. Surprisingly, he cried for about 20 seconds and then got comfy and fell asleep more quickly than if I stayed and nursed or cuddled him. He can also put himself back to sleep if he wakes in the middle of the night sometimes. I’ll also send daddy in when I know he wants milk and mommy and no milk will just upset him more.

Janet Lansbury: Her advice showed up on my newsfeed just at the right time. Be decisive. That’s exactly what I was missing. I thought, well, I’ll nurse him if he really needs it. As soon as I made the decision not to nurse him back to sleep under any conditions, I finally had some success. Taking away that option made it easier for him to give in and just fall asleep. He went from protesting for hours to ten minutes. He sometimes still puts up a big fuss, but we don’t nurse until…

Nursies when the Sun Shines: I’m not sure if he really understands what this book is about, but it definitely helped him get the idea that he can’t have milk until the morning. It also taught him about night and dark and morning and light. This is a problem in the winter though because it’s dark until pretty late in the morning, so with the advice of the badass breastfeeders, I bought a color changing clock. He knows he doesn’t get to nurse until it turns green. I’ve been slowly creeping that time later and later.

I hope this helps other sleep deprived mamas out there <3 Remember, they all sleep through the night eventually!

Disney 2016

Disney 2016

Hands down, best trip ever! I knew going with Owen would be more fun, but really, everything went perfectly and having our extended family there made it even more special!

Owen was a bit scared at first of pretty much everything, but he warmed up after a couple of days. We had to come back to the hotel around noon every day for a nap, but we all really needed a nap and it was nice to avoid the hottest part of the day too. Speaking of which, the weather couldn’t have been more perfect. 

We did everything I wanted to do and more! We even fit in some pool time and family reunion hotel room party :D it was so hoppin, some other guest called the cops. The kids were having a little too much fun running around I guess. I think that was Owen’s favorite part of the trip, playing with all of his cousins! It was so much fun watching them. They had a blast.

The other favorite was definitely the new Frozen ride. I’m now totally OK with them replacing Maelstrom. It was that good. And Owen’s reaction <3 this photo, priceless. He was so upset when it was over, he threw a tantrum.

Food was excellent as always. Owen was scared of the characters, so wasn’t sure how Boma breakfast was going to go, but he loved meeting and dancing with the characters. Oh the dancing! He loved the drummers in the Animal Kingdom and some of the other live music in Epcot. The belly dancer in Morocco too. He loves music so much.

I loved how he said “bye! Bye!” To all the characters, even the ones he was afraid of. Tigger took his little Pooh and Owen said “thank you, thank you ve much” when he gave it back :D 

He loved Small World and Little Mirmaid, Pooh and well, basically all the rides except Pirates maybe. I think we had to wait a little too long for pirates. I ended up nursing him the whole time.

Weaning when we get back will be a problem. He nursed so much on this trip. I’m not looking forward to that. Not looking forward to much about going home. Can we stay here forever please?

Happy Second Birthday!

Happy Second Birthday!

My baby is two! And we’re having more and more fun each day. Studying up on his Disney and singing along to all the tunes :) Playing with the neighborhood kids who just adore him.

Yesterday, his actual birthday, was Jay and Julia’s wedding. I was gone all day doing bridesmaid things, so we celebrated on Saturday with a family party. He had so much fun with Cousin Penny! They’re going to have a blast in Disney!

The wedding went very well. I sang Defying Gravity which went fairly well too. The venue was beautiful as was the bride! The food was great too. I had brought some leftovers from Saturday’s party which was much appreciated in the morning, but gad I left room for the good stuff. Yummmm! And of course there was much fun dancing!

I’m off work today to make up for yesterday. Owen and I went to his favorite park this morning, saw the animals, twice, and played on the playground with a bunch of other kids his age. Everyone is always very impressed with his bike riding and social skills :D Two things he doesn’t get from me!



We went to sesame place last week. We thought it was a disaster at first. It was super hot when we got there and it was just before his usual nap time, plus we had to wait a little bit for Carolyn, Tom and Connor. The first thing he we saw was Grover and we asked him if he wanted to get out of the stroller and take a picture with him and he flipped out. We’re pretty sure he thought we went there to feed him to giant, blue, furry monster. 

So we decided to go in a gift shop to cool off, but he saw the merry-go-round on the way, so we had to do that first. Waiting was torture. We had to wait through three rides, the last of which, the line was cut off just in front of us. Owen was crushed, but he waited pretty patiently, which bodes well for Disney. He was so excited when he finally got on. His friend, Connor though, was about at nervous Owen was his first time, and had to be nursed through the whole ride, poor guy.

Connor did better with the water. I had to convince Owen it was like running through the sprinkler. He spent a lot of time on my back. By the time we got to the Count’s Splash Castle, he thought it was pretty great running and splashing through the water. After that, the boys were pretty tuckered out. 

We decided to do a couple more rides. Owen went on with Bryan, Connor fell asleep in line :D Owen had a blast. We decided he was too tired to stay for the parade and made our way home. He fell asleep in the car for a little bit which he never does anymore. Overall, a successful trip.

Bryan introduced Owen to Frozen this week and he’s been walking around chanting, “music, of Frozen?” And singing “Let it go! Let it go!” And “deep, deep, deep, deep snow.” It’s too cute. We got him an Olaf and now he cuddles with Olaf and Pooh before bed. He’s going to love Disney so much. I can’t wait.

I love hearing him singing downstairs while I’m upstairs working :D he likes to sing along with Scout. So cute. We also have real conversations now, mostly about the “ammals.” We go to the park to see them every weekend and he finally got to the zoo this week with Bryan and his little friend.

We also finally got to the beach, but he was too scared to walk in the sand.mthe water was also scary. He asked to be put down, but cried when we did. He was very happy on my back though. 

His favorite thing is still playing with the big kids in the other court. Oh gosh. He was trying to hard to get them to play ball the other day. And trying to ride his bike and keep up with them. <3 

Julia’s bridal shower was a hoot. Her sister threw a lovely party. Unfortunately, my bridesmaid dress was a bit tight,Mao I’ve been working on losing weight. I’ll have to try on the dress again to see how I’m doing. I also found out this week that I need a new bathing suit because the elastic on mine is no good anymore. I guess it’s older than I realized. I also really need to get on buying new sneakers and getting a haircut. 

I did see a movie this week though. Saw Bad Moms with Carolyn. Was better than I expected. A lot of fun. And it was a matinee at the dine in theater, so super cheap, but comfy seats and quesadillas :D I also went to the Star Trek Experience at the Intrepid with Rachelle last month. Not as good at the thing in Vegas, but still a lot of fun. 

Fine Mommy, I’ll Drive Myself

Fine Mommy, I’ll Drive Myself

Work, oy. everyone voted no-go for deployment and they still deployed. Such a mess. We’ll be cleaning up production for the next few weeks. I’ve been doing a lot of singing as part of the ATT Cares Band too which is a lot more fun.

Owen reaches new levels of adorable every day. Bryan’s step mom was here last week and she got him a balance bike. He loves it. His determined face is so cute. He’s gotten very good very quickly. We’ve also been having a lot of fun at various parks on the weekend. He says new things every day. I love it when I catch him “reading” aloud to himself.  He finally says his own name now too.

He loves, loves, loves playing with other kids. He’s been visiting the court next to ours every afternoon in the hopes he’ll find kids playing outside. They were so nice the other day to play ball with him. He had such a good time, I couldn’t get him to sleep. He was going on and on about the “balls” and “catch.”

Yesterday morning he asked to go in the car when I brought him outside for our walk. I told him no, we’re going to the park behind our house. He got very upset, went into my purse, grabbed my keys, found my car key and started trying to open my car door. Well, after that I had to take him to the other park :D He doesn’t back down easily that’s for sure.


Post Baby Period

Post Baby Period

Warning, this post contains TMI.

Those of you who knew me as a teenager know I suffered quite a bit during that time of the month. Especially whenever I went on vacation! It wasn’t just the terrible, terrible cramps, I was tired and cranky and I dreaded it every month. The final straw was my 20th birthday. I was in bed for a week and couldn’t eat anything and it took me a month to feel better. Looking back, I probably had an ulcer from the aleve I was taking, but I’ll never know because I was too stupid to go to the doctor.

So I went on the pill, the magic, wonderful Seasonale. I still had pretty bad cramps for about three years after, but nothing like it was. The doctor thought I might have had endometriosis, seems likely. I eventually had to stop taking pain killers during my period because they gave me terrible stomach aches, but after a couple more years, I didn’t need them anyway.

Then, a few years ago, we decided we wanted a baby. I went off the pill in April and my period slowly came back to something that resembled a cycle around October. Super light and not crampy. I also felt a lot better emotially and my skin improved a bit. Apparently the pill was making me overly hormonal. I also felt way less sleepy all the time.

 By December the cramps had returned, but still very short and the period of time between ovulation and my period was still to short to conceive. I told my doctor and he basically said, yeah, you’ve only been tying like a month, come back in a year if you’re still not pregnant. Of course, three weeks later, I was pregnant. 

My period returned last December, again super light and without cramps. This past period was heavier, but still my heaviest day was like a medium day from when I was in high school. Still no cramps :) Mildly concerned that if I did have endometriosis, it will return or that I’ll suffer from fibroids like generations before me, but I’ll take feeling like a normal woman for now. I fully appreciate all I learned about my body when I was charting while trying to get pregnant too. I know exactly when I ovulate even without taking my temperature. I highly recommend any woman chart her cycles for at least a short period of time, you’ll learn so much.

Oh Sleep, Welcome Back

Oh Sleep, Welcome Back

Owen’s sleep has been so good this week, I started trying to night wean again. This time, the second half of the night. I have to nurse him when he wakes up at 1:30, but he seems OK with skipping all the other feedings. Well, not quite OK, but he doesn’t put up too much of a fight and it’s only been a few days. I think Pooh has been helping too. He seems quite comforted by his fluffy friend. Finally.

Speaking of milk, I had a little milk production issue yesterday which led to some hilarity. I had a bleb (when skin overgrows a milk duct opening) which led to a horribly clogged milk duct. I had taken a needle to the bleb, but had trouble unclogging it. I tried again in the afternoon because I was so uncomfortable and milk started squirting everywhere like a fountain! I quickly ran over to Owen as to not waste this liquid gold and ended up covering us both in milk and freaking him out so much he wouldn’t nurse the rest of the day! I’ll keep that in mind when I’m trying to wean :D

Owen also started building some cool creations with his duplos and megablocks, not just putting them together. He built himself a walker and several pretty nice trucks. My little engineer :D

I’ve been reading It’s OK Not to Share and it’s made me real excited to get some play dates going. It’s mostly about using conflict to learn mediation skills and social behavior rather than avoiding it. I also like their suggestions for dealing with tantrums. Very similar to Janet Landbury and How to Talk, but it’s good to drill this stuff into my head now before I need it :D


Another birthday

Another birthday

I turn 29 again tomorrow ;)  not doing anything special really. I should have gotten a haircut today. It’s been about a year and a half. I watched Gilmore Girls instead.

Work has been slightly less crazy, mostly because testing had been blocked by one of the other systems.

The bachelorette weekend was a blast. Some crazy rounds of telephone pictionary and taboo. Owen and Bryan survived the night without me too and actually got s little sleep. Probably more than I did :D

I swear Owen said “I love you” the other day, but he was just mimicking me. Trying to think of new things he says, but drawing a blank. “High five” is pretty recent I think. He likes “bike” “dog” and “tguck” a lot still.  He says “where dada?” “where pooh?” and “where togo?” (Where did it go. )  he’s also big on “a hug” followed by a big hug. He says “Buzz” and “toot.”

I don’t think I mentioned before I did bring him into work in April and he had a blast dancing on stage before I sang for take your kids to work day.




Been so busy at work. I fix one bug and ten more pop up in its place. I have a new manager because HR decided we didn’t need STTLs.

Weekends have been busy too. Julia’s bachelorette weekend in the Poconos is coming up. Owen is still not night weaned. Good luck to Bryan.

Owen has been getting into Pooh lately. He has two books he really likes and two Pooh plushies. “Pooh!” even Santa bear is “Pooh!” His favorite thing to do is “walk!” to the playground behind our house. He loves the “slide!” and “itswet!” Sometimes the swings are wet.  He likes watching the “geese!” and “dung!” (dogs). Sometimes there’s “tguck! zic!” (the ice cream truck plays music).

I think we’re going to stop gymboree, at least for the summer. He’s much more interested in playing outside right now. When we go, he has fun, but he also tries to escape out the door to go explore outside. I think we’re better off finding some hikes